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Plus One, No One

Well, it happened.  This past weekend was my high school reunion.  

If you ask me, TEN years flew by pretty quickly.
I just cannot believe it.  

A decade has passed since I walked across the stage of the new gym and shook my principal's hand as he said Congratulations.  I remember wearing my Honors Sash and a rope to distinguish my participation in Beta Club.  I remember how it poured down rain as my family and I went to eat at Mazzios (where I worked at the time) to eat my graduation dinner.  

Senior Luau circa 2005

I remember getting on the bus that had our entire graduating class on it (only 59 people) and a couple chaperones and we made our way to Memphis, TN.  I remember having to get up and sing a nursery rhyme and being super embarrassed having to do that.  

I remember getting on the boat and riding up and down the Mississippi River; winning door prizes, winning my first digital camera, eating food, and playing who would you rather kiss, date, etc.

Hunched over in the semi middle circa 2004

Realizing that ten years has passed makes me feel all types of emotions: old, nostalgic, stuck, blessed, and a little bit sad.  The other night I was reading Facebook, since the Valedictorian created a FB page for this event, and began to get emotional because I realized that every single person I went to high school with has a PLUS ONE.  Either married, divorced and remarried, engaged or dating: every single person responded with the tune of "Me and a plus one will be at dinner."  

At first, I commented all witty like:  "I'll be at dinner and just like the last ten years..no date."  A couple of people liked it.  But then after checking my social calendar and realizing I needed to be in two places at once, I decided I was not going to my high school reunion. 

Now I know what you are thinking, didn't you say you would go in high school? That you could not wait to go and see everyone again? 

Well, things change, people change their minds, and some people grow up to write a blog and put their opinion in bullet points.  Here are my reasons for not attending: 

  • Everyone has a PLUS one.  I have NO one.  I had a feeling going into this that a few people from high school would still not be married and guess what: I'm wrong.  They totally are.  Some are already on their second marriage.  If by chance they aren't married, they are seriously dating and an engagement ring is in their near future.  I know I am not defined by my relationship status, but I also don't want to be asked/reminded about it either.  Questions such as "dating anyone?  How come you aren't married yet?  Haven't found Mr. Right?  Well he is out there somewhere" circling around each conversation with each person I talk to is not my idea of a lovely evening.  

  • Thanks to Facebook, I don't have to go.  Social media allows me to not only keep up with my friends from high school, but I also know about their days even down to what they had for breakfast because they have posted a photo or status about it.  I know where they work, how many kids they have, what birthday party they threw said kid(s) and the last time they 'checked-in' at church.  Reunions used to be the times when people caught up on each other's lives, unfortunately, thanks to the apps on our phone - we don't have to do that anymore.

  • I am still great friends with some classmates and hang out with them already.  I have a handful of friends from high school that I am still really great friends with.  I see them on the regular and continue to hang out with them.  Whether it be at the gym, at dinner, or over at one of their houses; we make time for each other and update each other off-line about what's going on in our lives.  

  • I can't be in two places at once.  I had another event to attend that weekend in a city FOUR hours away.  I wanted to attend that event more and honestly, if there is one thing I have learned in the past ten years, it is to do what I want to do.  

    I think Amber said it best the other day on Twitter, so I would like to post her tweet here for anyone that needs a reason to say no to something: 

    I think the point of my long blog post/story is this: 

    I would rather spend meaningful time with my life-long friends, than sit around a table and smile politely to someone I haven't seen in a decade.

    2004 Pre Homecoming Queen Crowning 

So there it is, four reasons why I did not attend my high school reunion.  
Class of 2005 or before, did you go to yours?


  1. I think all the reasons behind your decision not to go are great because you are choosing what is important to you. If it doesn't make you happy, why put yourself through it?

  2. oh i hear you. my reunion isn't for a couple of years and i'm already beginning to think of reasons not to be there... mostly, i've realized the friends that i want to have from that time in my life are here now and don't need a reunion to see me... but one of them, who i heart so dearly, is the coordinator of it and surely i am a sucker! :) thanks for including me in here, i'm so flattered!

  3. My reunion will be next year and I kind of feel in the same boat as you. The people I want to stay in touch with I do, the ones I don't I still see around town and have to make awkward conversation with anyway and the rest I can creep on via Facebook. Still, there's something nostalgic about going, so I'm really torn!

  4. I was hesitant to go to my 10 year reunion last year, for some of those reasons, but I drug myself and had such a blast. Only a handful of people showed up though, so the open bar was very much appreciated. :D

  5. Kathleen Barnes @ Carrie BradsMarch 19, 2015 at 6:52 AM

    First of all, your blog redesign looks amazing - when do you revamp!? I love it!! Secondly, I love this post and your honesty. I won't be attending my high school reunion either and this makes me feel even more secure about it. XO

  6. Kat, I revamped right before New Years - thank you for the blog love.

    And you are welcome! I am glad I could help you feel secure! :)

  7. Haha I bet it was! I saw the pictures afterwards on Facebook and it just reiterated the whole fact that I didn't need to go. Glad you had a great time, Jessica! thank you for commenting as well!

  8. That's how I felt at first - and if I hadn't had to be in two places at once, I might have gone. Its a very torn situation I think for anyone.

  9. You are so welcome - thank you for always speaking truth in such a beautiful way. I appreciate you more than you know.

  10. EXACTLY, thank you for saying that and always leaving comments. Appreciate you, Cassie. :)

  11. Mine is coming up later this year and I have been dreading it since I realized it was right around the corner. I doubt I will go. I just don't care to listen to the summary of everyone's greatest hits or talk about what happened 10 years ago.

  12. That's exactly how I felt too, Rose! I didn't want to hear everyone's highlights when I don't feel like I can talk about any.


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